Q: Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

A: In case he got a hole in one

Q. How do you keep someone in suspense?

A. Oh, I'll tell you tomorrow!

Q. Why did the kids all eat their homework?

A. Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake!

Q. What kind of cheese isn't yours?

A. Nacho Cheese

Q: How can you tell a male chromosome from a female chromosome?

A:PULL DOWN IT'S GENES!!!!!!

Q. Why did a kid throw a clock out the window?

A. To see time fly.

Q.What does an envelope say when you lick it?

A. Nothing. It just shuts up.

Q:Why do elephants wear shoes with yellow soles?

A:So they can float upside-down in the custard without being seen.

Q:Have you ever seen an elephant floating upside-down in custard?

A:EXACTLY!

Q: How many moves do you have to do to put an elephant in a fridge?

A: Three! Open the door, put the elephant in the fridge and close the door.

Q:How many moves do you have to do to put a giraffe in a fridge?

A: Four! Open the door, take the elephant out of the fridge, put the giraffe in the fridge and close the door.

Q:There's a huge fire in the jungle. Which animal will survive?

A: The giraffe, because it's in the fridge!

Q: Why was 6 afraid of 7

A: Because 7 8 9!

Q: Why did the boy bring a ladder to school?

A: He wanted to see what High School was like!

Q: Why does it get hot after a baseball game?

A: Because all the fans have left!

Q: How can you tell if a calendar is popular?

A: It has a lot of dates!

Q: What does a bee use to brush its hair?

A: A honeycomb!

Q: How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?

A: His lips are moving.

Q: Where do you find a tortoise with no legs?

 A: Where you left it

Q: How can you make God laugh? 

A: Tell Him your plans for the future.

Q: Why don't they play poker in the jungle? 

A: Too many cheetahs.

Q: What do you call chicken in a hot tub?

Q: What do you call a fish with no eye?
A: FSH

 ~ I know I'm ROFL'in what about u? ~